Well, I’m worried and I know why, but it doesn’t really make sense. Here it is, so many of you know I’ve recently started seeing someone, he’s a really nice guy. I’m just worried about things between us. I mean, he’s given me no real reason to be worried about things, but I guess it is coming from what has happened with others in the past. I think my main issue is that I don’t exactly like how things started off somewhat and that I don’t know too much about him. The latter of which, I can work on fixing. So that’s why I’m worried. I just need to get past this and get on with my life, I know that worrying won’t help, it can only make things worse. Also, I know that whatever will be will be, because God is in control and everything is orchestrated by him.
So it’s a New Year
So, today starts another new year, 2009. As my blog entry yesterday stated, I’m hoping for a couple positive things this year. And I’m going to try my best to see that they come true! I know that I need to change some things in my life, such as my worrying about things that I have no control over. Also, I just need to let things happen naturally, not trying to rush anything or do anything like that. Whatever is meant to be is meant to be and worrying or rushing, etc won’t make it any better or make it last…
So, on that note, Happy New Year to everyone! 2009 is going to be a great year! 
My Hopes for a New Year
Well, today is New Years Eve and it marks my one year anniversary of coming out to my parents, which in and of itself was a rather big thing! I am happy that I did that as I no longer had to lie to my family about it, which I never liked doing, but I knew they wouldn’t accept it and they still don’t, but that it’s the focus of this entry!
My hopes for this coming year, 2009 are that I can get this new position I have applied for and that I can be in a successful monogamous relationship. I believe that anything else positive that happens in the coming year is just an extra!
I am not making any New Years resolutions, as we know most of those don’t make it past the first month!
I hope that all your hopes for this New Year come true!
Britton Christmas
So, here is what happened yesterday at the Britton Christmas. My aunt told my grandmother in confidence that she was notified today that her husband made a credit card payment for her but it was never received and therefore they had jacked up her interest rate from 0% to the default rate and now her monthly finance charges were astronomical. Then before we had the prayer over the meal my aunt stepped outside to get something out of her car and my grandmother told everyone what happened. When my aunt got back in of course she wasn’t happy. My grandfather, who has had at least a mini-stroke, could not understand pretty much anything about the whole situation and could not get this off of his mind the whole time. So my dad prays over the meal and he, my grandmother and I head into the kitchen where he tells my grandmother that she shouldn’t have said that as my grandfather will be on this all day. Then my aunt says that she always messes everything up for everyone and that her life is nothing but drama. The whole time this is going on, all I can think is, I could make this better for her in just a matter of moments and seriously considered coming out to the whole Britton Clan, but decided not to as my parents would surely kill me! So the whole thing went on for the rest of the time, my grandfather not being understand the situation. So therefore it was pretty much a downer…
Day Without a Gay
Tomorrow, December 10, 2008 is Day Without a Gay, a day to show your support for gay marriage and support for the over-turning of proposition 8 in California (as well as other similar things in other states). So they are asking people to “call in gay” to show your support. I believe that I will be participating… For more information, click on the image below!
My BlackBerry Storm Review
Well, as many of you know I was one fo the lucky 11 to get a BlackBerry Storm at the Verizon Wireless Store on Lawndale Drive in Greensboro on Friday. I’ve had a chance to play with it since then and can say I really like it! It has taken some getting used to, but then again, you have to get used to new gadgets.
My BlackBerry Storm
I have only experienced one random restart as of yet, while I was messing with the sound settings.
I really like the whole touchscreen aspect of this BlackBerry. I am getting used to the different keyboard layouts and I find them to be great.
There are some applications that do not work properly, but that is because the applications need to be updated. For instance, TwitterBerry does not work in landscape mode, although their website shows “screenshots” of TwitterBerry on a Storm in landscape mode. I contacted Orangatame about this and they said they don’t have a Storm to try it out on and asked if I would be interested in beta testing and of course I would! Also, Google Maps does not work correctly with GPS on the Storm. GPS is finally unlocked on the Storm and it works fine everywhere else, but Google Maps. BlackBerry Maps is able to find my exact location using GPS.
I also love the 3.2 megapixel digital camera with flash and video capabilities. The only issue I have with the camera is that it is sometimes slow to take pictures. It also offers geotagging!
It came with Flickr Uploader, Facebook, AIM, Yahoo Messenger and Windows Live Messenger.
I have found out a few cool tricks and know that I will find out many more in the coming weeks and months!
Cool Tricks:
- If you are in your email inbox and you place your finger over either the sender or the subject and hold it for a few seconds it will highlight the sender or subject and perform a search.
- If you are in an actual email message and you swipe your finger from left to right, it will go to the previous message. Also, the likewise is true, if you swipe from right to left, or will return to the inbox if you are at the first message.
Overall, I am so impressed with the BlackBerry Storm. It will only get better as updates are released, both to the BlackBerry device software and applications.
Update:
Battery life is about what I expected, with rather heavy use on Saturday, it lasted all day. Yesterday, I didn’t use it as much and it lasted until earlier this morning.
Attention Hateful People
I would just like to start out by saying, I am not going to seek out revenge for what you have done, because that is not up to me. What has been done is done and there’s not taking it back or changing what has been done. Remember that what you sow, you will also reap. If you reap hatefulness, you will reap that. You have just made me more skeptical of everyone!
I feel sorry for you that all you have to do is tattle on other people! If you have a problem with me, then why not discuss it with me before going to someone else? That is SO juvenile! I don’t know why people can be so childish. I can only pray that you grow up. I know that I can be childish, but if I have a problem with someone, I will let them know before I go to a higher up.
Again, other than being completely taken aback by this, I am not mad. I am upset. I will try my best to behave cordially toward this person, but contact will be shallow, as I know that I cannot trust this person. Oh well, there is always drama in life, you just have to make the best of it, and that is what I am going to try to do!
Parental Issues
So this afternoon while at work, I got a call from my dad. He said he had a request for me and I said ok. He proceeded to say that I needed to not talk about anything gay to them. They simply cannot take it. Lately my mother has been under a lot of stress and has had some issues with dizzy spells because of it. He somewhat implied that me talking about being gay and especially talking about how my new boyfriend and I met was the cause of some of this stress. Then he proceeded to tell me (yet again) that they are still hoping and praying that I will see that this (being gay) leads to no where and I will repent and turn from my wicked ways. They still think it is a choice. Why, oh why, would I CHOOSE to be gay? As I said in an earlier blog entry, the first time my parents found out about me being gay, they tried to get me to change by seeing my pastor and NOTHING changed other than me feeling depressed and so unhappy. I still had all the feelings for men that I had before, I just felt it was wrong because they were tellling me to think that way.
So, I’m going to try to still stay in touch with my parents, but they are making it so easy for me to shut them out of my life because of this. I don’t know if they’ll ever want to meet my boyfriend. And God forbid I actually get so far as to have a partner, or even better am able to get married and have a husband!!! Oh well, hopefully in time they can come to accept it. It’s just so hard for me to comprehend because it’s almost been a year since I came out to them. I love them but don’t understand why they think I have changed. I am the same Jonathan that I’ve always been, I just like men and am totally cool with others knowing that!! And in my honest opinion, if anyone has a problem with that, it is THEIR problem!!!